By Adi Ramanlal
Heads up, I am not the best writer. Though I pride myself on keenly observing people, intuitively catching what they are feeling and critical thinking.
My mother has been complaining about not having her ideal body type for many years, I’ve often heard “I’ve gained weight” “I can’t eat things” “I am fasting”. As a family we’ve joked many a times that she has dysmorphia- but intuitively I knew it’s a not a joke.
Being a “skinny” person her entire childhood, ate everything without a care, was almost complimented on “being so thin” (confused why it’s a compliment) it was deeply embedded in her sub-conscious that thin equals good equals happy equals being popular. Cut to her forts pregnancy and 40 kgs of gained weight, she delivered me all of 3 kgs and the 37 kgs held on tightly to her.
This was the start of what I term in my head as “diet downfall”. I never had any idea till I was 5 or maybe even 6, but kept hearing things, watching my mum skip meals, over exercise, count steps, choose fruit over cake and many other such things.
This was also the time I keenly observed another point, which is what I term “diet depression”
Mom gradually but surely became snappy, crabby, she would cook a hearty meal for us but sit in the corner sipping black coffee. The tipping point for me was on my 14th bday she asked how my birthday cake tasted, and when I asked her to eat a bite and try it herself, she politely declined saying she was fasting
I also observed at that point a deep sadness in her eyes, a sense of frustration and anger. Unfortunately at herself and more so for no reason
I began reading on the direct correlations between dieting and stress/ depression, sharing some in bullet points
1. Dieting can be a source of stress for some people, as they may feel overwhelmed by the restrictions and limitations of their new diet, and make mistakes in basic food habits in the desperation to become a certain body type
2 In turn, overeating can lead to guilt and shame, creating a negative cycle of stress and unhealthy eating habits. This cycle can Continue for years making matters worse and impacting health
3. Research has found that chronic stress can lead to an increase in cortisol, a hormone that can contribute to weight gain and difficulty losing weight. Simple. Stress. Diet. And still don’t lose weight. !!
4. When we are stressed, our body may release ghrelin, a hormone that increases hunger, making it more challenging to stick to a diet, again this works against us
5. Stress can also increase inflammation in the body, which can lead to a range of health issues, including weight gain and difficulty losing weight.
6. In some cases, the stress of dieting can lead to disordered eating behaviors, such as restrictive eating or binge eating, which can have significant negative impacts on both physical and mental health.
Developing a balanced and sustainable approach to dieting, rather than one that is overly restrictive or stressful, can also be beneficial for both physical and mental health, everything in moderation.
Mom today after counselling and years of support from the family is in a much better place. She’s accepted that the jeans she wore in college don’t fit her and she’s happy to get another bigger size.
It really takes a village to recognise and help loved ones with stressful situations whatever the trigger may be.
Now pls excuse me I’ve got to take my mom out to lunch :)